JaDe (xjaded_eyesx) wrote,

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Yesterday I spent the WHOLE day with chris and I enjoyed every second of it. I love him to death...I've noticed that I feel so comfortable with him now. I can eat like a pig with him and know that he's not like eww shes a pig. lol I love him. I'm so worried about him going on the cruise that its not even funny. I know I have to trust him, but still. I am so worried and scared that he's gonna come back and be like I cheated on you and I dont love you any more and blah blah blah. Pretty whack huh? I know, but I can't help it. He leaves tomorrow...and I'm not going to see him nor talk to him for SEVEN days...SEVEN days you guys...I can deal without the seeing him part because I'm used to it...but not hearing his voice for seven days is going to be crazy. I don't even want to think about it.

Gosh you guys this sucks. I miss him already. I love him to death.

I love you my chrisa chris. =)
Fuck man, I am having such a problem with him leaving. I'm not mad, I'm just really sad. I just don't know whats going to happen, I have no idea what he's doing, I can't talk to him. It's going to be so wierd. He's going with his two friends (Mike, and Yosuel) and they are both single, and spontaneous kind of guys and they are going to want to hook up with girls and chris is just going to be there and I can't help but think the worst. Gosh, I hate it. I just want him for myself, noone else can have him, only me. I'm bad I know. But I guess he's going to have a good time and so am I. It's just going to feel so wierd. He was telling me "what's wrong? why are you mad?" I'm not mad...I'm not mad at all...I'm just upset...I was crying. lol I'm such a dork. He doesn't know I was crying. I want to be talking to him now but he's not calling me and what the hell. Whatever get over it Jade. I'm going to have a good time. I'm just worried. I don't want anything happening. He's leaving early tomorrow and its like saying goodbye for seven days. Gosh I can't think about it. I'm driving myself crazy. I need to talk to someone to get my mind off of it. Whatever I know he's going to be worried about me while he's there...maybe not. whatever. blah.
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